When I began this blog, I hoped to create a place for women to come so they could share their fears or concerns and get information from a personal stand point on what a body lift and breast lift involves. Never did I think I'd be one of "those" people that has a bad experience with cosmetic surgery. Sure, I knew there were risks of infection but was that something I needed to concern myself with? No! That could never happen to me.
Yet.... here I am, day 3 of being stuck in the hospital... barely able to walk. I haven't seen my children in 3 days. I'm sick to my stomach. No one should EVER have to go through this. I'm trying to not think of the what-if's but maybe that will help others. So, what if I'd have made Dr. Bradley prescribe me an antibiotic after he took out the penrose drain? What if I had gotten a compression garment right after the surgery where the hematoma would have never formed? What if I had gone to the ER when I woke up drenched in the yellow/orange fluid that was said to be serous fluid? What else could I have done to prevent this?! For those of you planning on cosmetic surgery, think of these things and get on top of them BEFORE you get stuck in the hospital.... you can never be too careful!
If Dr. Camp decides to use a wound-vac on my 2 open wounds, then I will also have to pay $200 and then 10% of whatever a wound vac costs. Kinda crappy! Dr. Camp, by the way, is the surgeon who removed the pus pockets... apparently Dr. Bradley doesn't have an affiliation with any hospital...?! Wish I'd have known this prior to surgery because yes, it would have made a difference. He is an excellent surgeon but he can't even follow up with me because I need hospital care. Which brings me to another point, ask your doctor what hospital you will need to go to in case of emergency and whether or not he is on staff. If your doctor is not affiliated with any hospital, I would recommend selecting another doctor. I didn't even know to ask this... I just assumed. ha!
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Monday, June 13, 2011
lucky to be alive I'm told...
Saturday afternoon (June 11, 2011) I came to the Memorial Hospital ER to find out what the hard lump on my left hip was (see previous post for picture). After spending about 4 hours in the ER, I had a CT Scan done and then after waiting an hour for the results, found out that I had a massive pus pocket! This stretched from the area where my hematoma was drained to my left hip. The ER doctor informed me that I would have to get the pocket removed by operation.
Dr. Linda Camp performed the surgery... the initial guess was that the pus pocket was 9x3x15cm, but she said to me after the operation that the pus extended to the right side of my body, down my left hip, around to my back and up by my belly button. She cut along the incision previously made by Dr. Bradley. I went into surgery some time around 11p.m. and got into my recovery room around 1:30 a.m. After Dr. Camp explained that the pus pocket was much larger than expected, she informed me that I would have 2 wide open wounds that would have to heal from the inside out so no infection was trapped in.
I am in severe pain, on 6mg of morphine every 2 hours and still feel like hell =( I can't believe I'm here at the hospital and dealing with this. I had to be operated on! It started to all sink in....
Sunday, Dr. Camp came to change my wound dressings and I got to see what I was dealing with for the first time.... warning... it's disgusting and graphic!!!
Yeah.... so I cried. Like all day. And all night. I'm so upset. How the fuck does this happen?!?!?! I was so careful and now I have these HUGE holes in me that are going to take AT A MINIMUM 2 months to heal! The test results of the pus came back and I have BOTH strep infection and a staph infection!!!!!!!!! I am a mommy of 2 small kids and I can't even pick up my babies for a month! Their birthday parties are going to be cancelled because I won't be healed enough by July 2 to host a party =( It's my daughter's first birthday =( =( =( =(
The changing of the dressing is SOOOOOOO painful. I scream every time they pull out the gauze and stuff new gauze back in even with the morphine. I don't even care what the scar looks like, I want to be healed with no death scare!!!!!!!!!!!!! And when am I going to get a regular shower? Or be able to stretch my arms, or bend over to pick something up?! My life is so jacked! I'm trying to stay positive but the last 4 weeks have been HELL and it only is getting worse!
Dr. Camp explained to me that I'm lucky to be alive.... the infection started where the penrose drain from the hematoma had been removed and had spread to a large amount of my abdomen... yet it never went to my blood stream which would have easily taken my life =/
Will update when I get out of this hospital bed =(
Dr. Linda Camp performed the surgery... the initial guess was that the pus pocket was 9x3x15cm, but she said to me after the operation that the pus extended to the right side of my body, down my left hip, around to my back and up by my belly button. She cut along the incision previously made by Dr. Bradley. I went into surgery some time around 11p.m. and got into my recovery room around 1:30 a.m. After Dr. Camp explained that the pus pocket was much larger than expected, she informed me that I would have 2 wide open wounds that would have to heal from the inside out so no infection was trapped in.
I am in severe pain, on 6mg of morphine every 2 hours and still feel like hell =( I can't believe I'm here at the hospital and dealing with this. I had to be operated on! It started to all sink in....
Sunday, Dr. Camp came to change my wound dressings and I got to see what I was dealing with for the first time.... warning... it's disgusting and graphic!!!
Yeah.... so I cried. Like all day. And all night. I'm so upset. How the fuck does this happen?!?!?! I was so careful and now I have these HUGE holes in me that are going to take AT A MINIMUM 2 months to heal! The test results of the pus came back and I have BOTH strep infection and a staph infection!!!!!!!!! I am a mommy of 2 small kids and I can't even pick up my babies for a month! Their birthday parties are going to be cancelled because I won't be healed enough by July 2 to host a party =( It's my daughter's first birthday =( =( =( =(
The changing of the dressing is SOOOOOOO painful. I scream every time they pull out the gauze and stuff new gauze back in even with the morphine. I don't even care what the scar looks like, I want to be healed with no death scare!!!!!!!!!!!!! And when am I going to get a regular shower? Or be able to stretch my arms, or bend over to pick something up?! My life is so jacked! I'm trying to stay positive but the last 4 weeks have been HELL and it only is getting worse!
Dr. Camp explained to me that I'm lucky to be alive.... the infection started where the penrose drain from the hematoma had been removed and had spread to a large amount of my abdomen... yet it never went to my blood stream which would have easily taken my life =/
Will update when I get out of this hospital bed =(
Saturday, June 11, 2011
WILL IT EVER END?!?!?!?!
HEADING OUT TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM SOON!!!!
That's right! WHAT THE F!? I called Dr. Bradley yesterday & he said everything about the yellow/orange fluid was normal, keep it covered, keep compression garment on, yada yada. Fears gone.
THENNNNNNN
About 30 minutes ago I noticed this knot....
That's right! WHAT THE F!? I called Dr. Bradley yesterday & he said everything about the yellow/orange fluid was normal, keep it covered, keep compression garment on, yada yada. Fears gone.
THENNNNNNN
About 30 minutes ago I noticed this knot....
on the side of my left hip =( So, me being about ready to puke and have another freak out session, has Mark call Dr. Bradley. He's in New York and can't see me so I have to get to the E.R. Well, I have to find a babysitter and get everything ready for the sitter so it's not like I can just GO. I'm sitting here FREAKING out and think I'm going to die. Dr. Bradley said I'd need a MRI or a CAT scan to identify the fluid and then they would decide what to do then. I'm going to barf. I don't have the stomach for things like this =/ This knot is about the size of an orange, bright red and hard as a rock. It's warm to the touch which makes me think infection..... ugh!
Friday, June 10, 2011
4 weeks post op
Yesterday I ended up swelling back up. It's like all the fluid I had leaked out came back and waa-laa, back to hell =( In the past 4 weeks I have gone through a series of struggles and I feel I should be much further along with my healing:
May 13, 2011 - - - had my surgery
May 21, 2011 - - - first opening on my right side, didn't leak fluid but as of 4 weeks, is still an open sore and doesn't appear to be closing or healing anytime soon
May 22, 2011 - - - spot opens on my incision straight below belly button and leaks black, thick blood
May 26, 2011 - - - another small opening in my incision forms next to the first and is also leaking the thick, black blood. first anxiety attack, can't sleep through the night and having sharp chest pains
May 27, 2011 - - - hematoma is diagnosed and drained, penrose tube inserted in opening
June 2, 2011 - - - penrose drain taken out
June 5, 2011 - - - beginning of the swelling on the left side of my belly button down to the incision area, about a 4x3in area
June 8, 2011 - - - leak out a large amount of yellowish/orange fluid (through gauze pads, underwear, garment, tank top, and pants
June 10, 2011 - - - large area swollen again and squishy fluid in my stomach (seroma?)---see pics below
this is my view ^^^
2 weeks ago I had an "outty" belly button =/
At least I'm healing nicely in back.... =/
May 13, 2011 - - - had my surgery
May 21, 2011 - - - first opening on my right side, didn't leak fluid but as of 4 weeks, is still an open sore and doesn't appear to be closing or healing anytime soon
May 22, 2011 - - - spot opens on my incision straight below belly button and leaks black, thick blood
May 26, 2011 - - - another small opening in my incision forms next to the first and is also leaking the thick, black blood. first anxiety attack, can't sleep through the night and having sharp chest pains
May 27, 2011 - - - hematoma is diagnosed and drained, penrose tube inserted in opening
June 2, 2011 - - - penrose drain taken out
June 5, 2011 - - - beginning of the swelling on the left side of my belly button down to the incision area, about a 4x3in area
June 8, 2011 - - - leak out a large amount of yellowish/orange fluid (through gauze pads, underwear, garment, tank top, and pants
June 10, 2011 - - - large area swollen again and squishy fluid in my stomach (seroma?)---see pics below
this is my view ^^^
2 weeks ago I had an "outty" belly button =/
At least I'm healing nicely in back.... =/
The first side picture is at 2 weeks post op, the next one is at 4 weeks post op. I looked much better 2 weeks ago! I'll be calling Dr. Bradley's office as soon as they open today to see what should be done... here we go again....
Thursday, June 9, 2011
another stepping stone
Wednesday night I couldn't sleep at all again =/ getting so tired of this.... I just want to feel normal! I think what initially got me upset was I had started swelling really bad and was terrified I'd have to get another drain put in. Last night I went to bed praying for the best and I woke up soaked in a yellow-orange drainage mess. During the night (one in which I actually slept), I must have drained out all the excess fluid from the same spot the penrose drain had been placed. I cleaned up and put another gauze pad on. Have felt 100% today, with no nausea, tiredness or feelings of anxiety =) The drainage has stopped and my stomach is no longer hurting at the incision site. I will give Dr. Bradley's office a call even though I'm pretty sure this is normal and just took a little longer to come out. I don't think there is an infection because I have no fever and haven't had one in the last week, there is no odor, no green color, no hard or thick spots, and no pain anymore. Lucky me =) I did my research on what to expect with tummy tuck/body lift surgery and nothing could have prepared me for all of this. Dr. Bradley said that where the penrose drain was would dry up and quit draining after 3-4 days and now it has been a full week and I'm having more drain than ever! I'm 4 weeks post op as of tomorrow and have really been through a lot and getting pretty exhausted with it all!
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
blah....
well I'm 3 weeks and 4 days post op and feeling pretty terrible =/ I've had flu like symptoms, swelling like crazy and am sore EVERYWHERE.. I haven't been able to keep down any food or even water, I'm dizzy everytime I stand up and my head is pounding... this sucks =( It seems like it's been so long since I've just felt like myself. I want to spend this summer having some fun but that doesn't seem possible.
Dr. Bradley gave me ativan after my anxiety attack and that helped a lot... then I went to my general practitioner and told him what was going on and he wanted to put me on lexapro to help with stress, anxiety and depression, so I started taking that Sunday night. Not a big fan of taking medication but hopefully I never have to experience another anxiety attack!
I started using silicone strips for the scars Sunday, too. Dr. Bradley recommends Sammons Preston brand so that's what I have =) They were pretty expensive and they are a huge pain in the bum to use at all but oh well, guess it's worth it.
Pretty much feel like crap so I'll write more later and take pics when I can. I'm pretty worried about this swelling; praying it's not the hematoma coming back =( =(
Dr. Bradley gave me ativan after my anxiety attack and that helped a lot... then I went to my general practitioner and told him what was going on and he wanted to put me on lexapro to help with stress, anxiety and depression, so I started taking that Sunday night. Not a big fan of taking medication but hopefully I never have to experience another anxiety attack!
I started using silicone strips for the scars Sunday, too. Dr. Bradley recommends Sammons Preston brand so that's what I have =) They were pretty expensive and they are a huge pain in the bum to use at all but oh well, guess it's worth it.
Pretty much feel like crap so I'll write more later and take pics when I can. I'm pretty worried about this swelling; praying it's not the hematoma coming back =( =(
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
2 weeks 5 days post op
Yesterday I was supposed to get the penrose drain out but unfortunately, it's still draining so Dr. Bradley wanted to leave it in and check on Thursday if it was ready to come out. I hope so! My first 2 weeks post op have been such an experience. I've gone through pain, depression, anxiety, anger and been completely helpless. There is nothing that can quite prepare you for cosmetic surgery. I am trying to just live it out, see the bigger picture, and remember my reasons for doing this but I just want normal back. I want to pick my son up and swing him around. I want to not jump every time someone gets close to me because I think they might bump into me. I want to be happy again. I've been in a good mood the last few days but I'm not quite myself. I want to laugh and think about all of the fun my little family is going to have this summer. But then, when I mention little things like taking the kids places, my husband reminds me that this summer we're buckling down so that we can get surgery paid off. I understand and it's the right thing to do, just makes life even more depressing..... I want to get out and have fun and not worry about every penny =(
On the bright side, I'm not in any pain, I can stand up straight, I can sleep on my side, and my swelling has gone down enough where I can fit into some of my old clothes =) Dr. Bradley asked me yesterday if I was happy with my breast size and said he thought maybe he had made them too big. At first I hesitated, and said, "they're okay, will take some getting used to." But then when I got home, I did a double look and I like the size....just want to see them fully healed! I'm happy I went with a larger pair because with my big arms and broad body, I think they actually fit me pretty well.
Here are some pictures from today... incision is looking excellent! Nice, smooth line and not many problem areas except for in the front.
And..... drum roll please.......
On the bright side, I'm not in any pain, I can stand up straight, I can sleep on my side, and my swelling has gone down enough where I can fit into some of my old clothes =) Dr. Bradley asked me yesterday if I was happy with my breast size and said he thought maybe he had made them too big. At first I hesitated, and said, "they're okay, will take some getting used to." But then when I got home, I did a double look and I like the size....just want to see them fully healed! I'm happy I went with a larger pair because with my big arms and broad body, I think they actually fit me pretty well.
Here are some pictures from today... incision is looking excellent! Nice, smooth line and not many problem areas except for in the front.
Little bumpy right under the tattoo but other than that, it's a thin, flat scar =)
BIKINI SHOT!!! I'm so excited to get my body toned back up so I can actually see those abs I worked so hard for! Dr. Bradley said I can start walking, but no major aerobics where I stretch the scar for 6 weeks. I'll be the happiest girl ever when I hit the gym like I used to; 6 days a week, running 2 miles per day and an hour of strength & ab work. I know it'll take some time to get back to where I was considering I'll be out of the gym for 7 weeks total but that's nothing in the scheme of things. I've got the motivation, determination and access to get my body looking as perfect as possible =)
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